# 9

How best to use an iphone on speaker? The pictures explained it all, what more do I need to say?

# 6

I went out tonight to Pulau Tikus to get this Belgium chocolate cake for Dada’s early birthday, as parents and sis will be coming over for a visit this weekend. The cake is now lying in my fridge, tempting me to lick it! Slurp…

Coincidentally, MV’s parents are also planning for a visit this weekend too! Hmm…

Let’s wait and see how things turn out.

# 5

I was on call on Tuesday. How awesome it was to say I only had ONE admission! In ward c6! Imagine that. One of the few “madhouses” only had ONE admission over 14 hours. And out of the 14 hours call, I spent 2/3 in this on call room, which used to be an isolation room. Comfy!

# 4

I’m on call tomorrow and I’m having pre-call syndrome today. It’s raining and I’ve decided not to go anywhere, including the gym.

This was what I made for dinner.

Ingredients: Lettuce, lightly steamed broccoli, tomatoes and cherry tomatoes, ham and cheese in thousand island sauce.

What a healthy dish! What a hearty meal!

#1

I was on call on Friday in ward c6 (Neuromedical/ Endocrine) with a bubbly friend, CJ in c5 (General/ Gastroenterology/ Rheumatology/ Infectious diseases), whose mom is in Pg for a visit. She was cooking CJ dinner, and had cooked extra for me!

It was home-made, and it was yummy!

Thanks Auntie! And thanks CJ for washing the dishes! ;)

A thousand words

If the title scares you, let me assure you that there’s nothing to be afraid of. If what you are looking for is something to read for leisure and not lengthy blogs , this is definitely for you.

It’s nothing but a combination of my passion for photographs and a method to make my life more exciting…. On a daily basis!

I will post at least one picture (and not limited to), everyday on anything that happened on that day. A picture is worth a thousand words, right?

But of course, I may not be as consistent as to post it everyday.. ;) But do come back and stay tune for the next 365days!

Under The Sea

I can’t believe it! I actually did and went through with it!

To say I have a reason to do it, I just couldn’t point it out. To say there was a calling, I just didn’t feel it. It was more of a last minute decision, although it was on the optional itinerary. Verbally, I said I was going to do it. But I eventually realized that I was not mentally prepared.

So what is it that I did out of the blue?

SCUBA diving.

MV accompanied me to the neighbouring chalet to look for diving instructor. And we found one at Alu-alu Divers. Introduced ourselves to Mel, who became my instructor and almost immediately, we started our “lesson”.

First session was watching an introductory video, covering the basics- the breathing regulators, the suits, the complications, commonly used sign language which is universally accepted, etc.

After finishing the video I thought I was done for the day. But how wrong I was. Immediately, I was taught how to set up the buoyancy control device (BCD- the jacket the holds the oxygen tank and also helps in staying afloat, ascend and descend at will). Then, load it into a speedboat, and off we went to Turtle’s Bay.

Ok, can’t possibly be bad, I thought to myself. I should be able to handle the dive, since I am quite a fast learner.

But boy, oh boy. We weren’t going for a dive just yet. 200m from the shore, the speedboat stopped and I was told to jump off the boat and swim to the shore! I was speechless. My throat went dry. I thought it wasn’t a pre-requisite to be able to swim (but of course, I’ve already told Mel that I could). So why is she asking me to swim from such a distance away? I thought they were all joking (They meaning, Mel, Dex- the other instructor, with 3 other seasoned divers). But nope. They were dead serious. Dex even jumped off the boat first to “encourage” me.

So I followed suit. And then Mel joined me. Dex and the other divers left for another location. Leaving Mel and myself in the water, with a life jacket that Mel was hanging on to, and refused to give it to me.

It was difficult. I had my contact lens on, so I swam with my head above the water. I don’t know why it never occurred to me to close my eyes and swim properly, or asked for a pair of goggles, since I had it in the boat. I started to swim. And Mel was there all the while, continuously encouraging me to continue and float on my back if I was tired.

Throughout the whole time, I remember thinking, I’m never gonna make it… I’m too tired... I can do it... No, I can't. I’m going to drown… I want to give up… I don’t want to dive anymore… I can do it… No, I can’t make it… The next thing I know, my feet could touch the sand. Oh what a wonderful feeling it was! Finally! Feet, ground. Shore, reached!

The whole idea was to make me face any fear I had of the sea and hopefully, abolish it. And also to learn to trust Mel.

Shortly after that, the boat came back with our BCDs, which we put on, then check the equipments for each other (standard procedure), as we were considered “Buddies”. The next lesson was learning to use the regulator (the hose that connects the oxygen tank to the mouth), how to locate it if it dropped from the mouth, how to clear the mask, practicing some sign language, etc.

After that, we took the boat, pick up the other divers, and went to D’Lagoon for my first dive!

My first dive was awkward. I was swimming upright, just like a seahorse!

But whatever that I saw, was just marvelous. It was a whole new world underneath. It’s one thing watching these marine life on TV, a whole new experience altogether to see and be there in person. It was almost magical.

We dove for about 45 minutes, as deep as 15 metres.

The next day, I reached Alu-alu by 8.30am and started to assemble my BCD for my 2nd dive. This time, we shared the boat with 3 other Chinese girls and their instructor, Alex. Again, we went to D’ Lagoon, but this time to the beach first. Alex was teaching the girls what I learned yesterday, and Mel was teaching me how to snorkeling and use my fins properly so as to not dive like a seahorse anymore!

After that, we went to the deeper side of D’ Lagoon for our 2nd dive. Again, I was diving like a seahorse every now and then. But it was equally as magical.

That afternoon, I watched the 2nd video- which covers the complications of diving Eg. decompression syndrome, nitrogen narcosis, etc. I also had my multiple choice questions test after that, which I passed. ;)

On the 3rd day, was my 3rd and 4th dive to complete my license requirement. The 3rd dive was to T3, which I liked best. And the last dive was to the Shark Point Pinnacle, which of course I saw a shark, as big as the size of a speed boat, from afar. Dove for about 50 minutes each time, as deep as 18 metres.

I love my diving experience. It was a completely different world down there. I felt like a part of the underwater world. During my last dive, I swore I felt like a mermaid, only without the graceful movements. I was still in awe, and somewhat surreal. I couldn’t help but thinking, what an interesting life my dad was living when he was active in diving previously.

I’m definitely diving again. I finally understood,

“One thing we cannot escape- forever afterward, throughout all our life, the memory of the magic of water and its life, of the home which was once our own- this will never leave us.” – William Beebe.

And it never will.

With Mel, on a kayak!

Another chapter has ended

After what felt like forever, my surgical posting finally ended with 7 days of break, including Merdeka break. So what have I learned in my 2nd posting? ALOT- in terms of medical/surgical knowledge and skills in procedures, survival skills, social and EQ.

There’s no doubt that during each posting you learned the clinical knowledge that may or may not have been acquired from the textbooks. Some may be differently practiced, since our textbooks are from US and UK. Nevertheless, the principles are the same. So, as you progressed in the posting, as you see more cases, this clinical knowledge can be picked up along the way.

However, what’s so different about this posting as compared to other departments is the mental stress. The work load is more than tolerable, but the mental stress that comes from being at work is a torture. Knowing that your every move is being observed and constantly under scrutiny by the specialists. That being just one aspect that contributes to the mental stress.

When things are not done fast enough, it’s your fault- no reason is entertained, period. And when it is done right, it’s your duty- don’t expect to get any credit. Because when a sick patient recovers from his illness after a surgery and a long stay in the hospital, the credit goes to the surgeon, not the staff who look after him/her in the ward, and nurture him to health.

Maybe that’s why surgeons are stereotyped as arrogant. But of course, there are always exceptions.

Some specialists are so nice, it humbles me just to be around them, whether it’s assisting them in a surgery, chit-chating with them or having meals with them. My sub-specialty postings to neurosurgery and urology, were both wonderful breaks in between my general surgery posting. Not only am I able to learn better, the environment as a whole is so much “healthier”.

My MOs are all wonderful people, who allowed me quite a decent hands-on surgical exposure in the operating theatre. Towards my last 2 months of posting, I managed to perform 2 appendicectomies, a few saucerization of carbuncles, some incision and drainage of abscesses, chest tube insertion and suprapubic catheterization and many, many bandings of haemorrhoids.

It was a wonderful feeling after each procedure- a sense of “high-ness” without needing any booze or drugs, which I realized can be quite addictive. So am I “addicted” to surgery? Yes. Am I specializing in surgery? Perhaps, but that’s another day, another story.

All in all, I’m glad I had the opportunity to go through surgery posting in this hospital. It was really quite an experience and truly an eye opener, with its own drama, betrayal and gossip.

1st Solo Shoot

So I had the weekend off. Parents couldn’t find time to visit me. Mom told me to stay put and rest. MV, unfortunately, is on-call.

What more can I ask for? A day of total relaxation.

Woke up late today, at 9am to the beautiful sun shining into my bedroom. What a rare sight! If you think 9am is early for Sunday, I would agree with you. No thanks to the years of medical school, sabotaging my sleep-wake cycle.

Had a long breakfast at Transfer Road, which is famous for the Roti Canai and Teh Tarik.

Then off I went for my first shooting with my baby.

A new man in my life

This is an official declaration of my new love.

A love so strong it knows no boundaries. A love so true it can never be divided.

The new love of my life.

Name: Ben

Date of birth ( i.e. purchase ): 14 Aug 2010

Place of birth ( Again, i.e. purchase ): Photo Easycam, KOMTAR

May we create beautiful and everlasting memories together! ;)

It’s all about the timing- April 27, 2010.

The day started off as usual- reviewing patients, rounds with specialist, ward work, clerk new cases, scans, etc. Nothing unusual or extraordinary happen. There were mentions and reminders of it throughout the day but it wasn’t until that night when it finally hit me.

I have actually completed my 1st posting as a houseman! I’ve been working and earning my own wage through my sweat (literally) and (patient’s) blood for 4 months now. Getting all sentimental about having to leave this department, which provided my very first experience as a doctor, I decided to go back to my ward. All the more because this new found friend, J, whom I became close to over the last month, was on call that night.

For the last 4 months, we’ve been changing work colleagues and wards every month. But it wasn’t until the last month, that I was assigned to work with this incredible team. I would say that we compliment each other and that was what made this such a strong team. Needless to say, the working environment was very conducive with wonderful MOs.

Anyway, being on call means having to eat cold, tasteless, and many a times, the sight itself is an appetite killer and hunger suppressor. Now I’m a person who enjoy good food but at the same time, I’m not a fussy eater. But for the hospital to tender such expensive contracts to a particular caterer for each meal, 4 meals a day, the food is completely unacceptable. Rumour has it that each meal cost around RM30. If you think the price is not too bad, you have to see what they serve to understand what I mean by the price being ridiculous. I’m sure there’s more to it, than meets the eyes, if you know what I mean.

Since I’ve decided to drop by, I sms-ed J to ask if she and SZ (the other person on call that night) would like something (edible) for dinner. Within 2 minutes, my phone rang. It was Anu and I picked up. It turned out, she was here in the island, and was wondering if I was free to have dinner together.

Oh, in my heart, I was thinking, why didn’t you call a bit earlier? I couldn’t possibly say no, since she drove all the way from mainland. But it wasn’t right to say yes either since I most likely would have to go buy dinner.

In the end, I accepted the dinner invitation from Anu, and took down orders for Subway and Starbucks from J. With my quick wit, I decided to have 2 hours dinner with Anu, and then get food for my fellow colleagues, informing them that I would be 2 hours late.

The night went on very smoothly. I explained to Anu the reason why I had to leave early, and to J and SZ why I had to be late. They were all very understanding and accepting. It all ended well.

Above: Japanese dinner at Matzuki with Anu

Above: 2 other colleagues who were coincidentally decided to visit

Above: Look at how happy they were, enjoying good food during their call, which from what I heard was superb- NO new admission throughout the night.

Green, green grass of Home

When people say that grass is greener on the other side. I just couldn’t agree with them more. When you finally get what you’ve wanted, it’s almost always doesn’t turn out the way you’ve expected/ hoped it to be.

I for one is living with that for a fact, day in and day out.

How is your life so? you asked. Didn’t you just gave the whole I’m-happy-to-live-in-the-present speech? you asked further.

Well, I’m happy to be alive but it’s far from a perfect life. I wake up every morning (and I mean EVERY morning), going to a work that was not what I enrolled for.

At the present, I have strong bonding with only one aspect of my work. I can’t live without it. I can’t work without it. I must have it with me by my side for me to survive the day.

What else could it be? It’s none other than my black pen.

As student, I had the opportunity to just sit by my patients’ bedside and talk to them (or at least, listen to them talk). The older generation will share their life experiences and offer food for thoughts, which can span from the importance of being filial, to their conspiracy theories on politics! With no big responsibilities, or immediate dateline, this was all possible in the past.

At present, it seems like a luxury to me. The turnover of patients in this particular department is so fast, I hardly have the chance to get to know all their problems well, let alone have time to build rapport with them.

I am in no way implying that my treatment is lacking physically. But the only thing lacking is that psychological confidence and comfort, that I am not able to build on, which in my opinion is very important in the healing process.

Maybe I should take up something that allows me to do just that, like geriatrics or oncology. But these are very “heavy” specialty, in my opinion.

But there’s no rush in it. I’m still building my character and style as a doctor. In time, I’m sure I would know what I want to specialize in. Whatever the decision may be, hopefully when I reach “the other side”, the grass is still green.

A Gift for U & Me

We're waiting for our flight to Singapore by Tiger Airways in Penang International Airport.

For some reasons, everything feels comfortable and familiar to me, as though I've been there many times. But the truth is, I've only flew from Pg twice, back in those days when I was studying in India. Perhaps, the feeling came from all the travelling around Europe. Or perhaps, I'm older ( and wiser, I hope ) now, so it takes more to surprise me and push me off my comfort zone. Or even perhaps I'm just not bothered anymore.

The one thing that's different now would probably be that we are more "seasoned" travellers, who are earning our own income and wanting to splurge on materialistic squander than we should at the moment.

Reflecting back on my life, I would say that I did ok. Of course I have my downs and of course, I would not be where/who I am today if it wasn't for the many, many people in my life. In spite of all that, I wouldn't do anything differently had I given the chance to turn back time.

A cousin asked me recently what would I regret most for not having done, if I were to leave this world tomorrow. My answer was simply, nothing. I was THAT contented with my life.

I am just grateful to live in the present.

I am where I am today because of my family.

I am who I am today because of my upbringing, the people I've met, and the good and bad experiences in my life.

I am ME. I am simply Lyn.